My (Latest) Pet Peeves

I let trivial shit piss me off waaaay too much. I'm hoping by compiling this list I will save a few bucks on my next therapy session.

MY PET PEEVES

*this list is directed at no one in particular...except for the chode in number 3*

1. People who are more than five minutes late
2. People who don't respond to my email
3. A dude who takes a shit in my bathroom for 40 minutes with no explanation or apology...ON OUR FIRST DATE
4. Being a douchebag
5. Parking over the lines
6. Parking backwards
7. Getting away with shit when I can't
8. Brown nosing
9. My mother
10. Whistlers
11. People who hum - I hate hummers almost as much as whistlers
12. People who won't say 'fuck' when they really want to
13. People who run marathons (just a little jealousy here...)
14. People who are 40 years old but don't have a driver's license
15. Or a job (mostly targeting men on this one)
16. Buying a dog when you don't even see your kid
17. Assholes
18. My sister (might be related to #17)
19. Cats (although I always seem to have one)
20. Judgey people
21. People who drive 10 miles under the speed limit in the left lane
22. People who slam on their brakes because you're riding their ass because they're driving 10 miles under the speed limit in the left lane
23. Shit talkers (DAMMIT, I do that)
24. People who claim to not watch tv
25. Jennifer Lopez
26. My mother
27. Friends who don't understand when you cancel because you have diarrhea
28. Cross-eyed people
29. My phone dinging with a text when I'm trying to catch five minutes of sleep before work/class (usually Mother)
30. Men
31. HAPPY FUCKING PEOPLE (at least I said fucking when I wanted to)
32. Smokers (dude...it's 2013. You smell. And you likely have bronchitis/pneumonia/emphysema...WONDER WHY!!! Plus...you smell.)
33. My mother

Anyone else?